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    Stop stressing so much

    “Once upon a time a psychology professor walked around on a stage while teaching stress management principles to an auditorium filled with students. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the typical ‘glass half empty or glass half full’ question. Instead, with a smile on her face, the professor asked, ‘How heavy is this glass of water I’m holding?’ Students shouted out answers ranging from eight ounces to a couple pounds. She replied, ‘From my perspective, the absolute weight of this glass doesn’t matter.  It all depends on how long I hold it. If I […] More

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    Careful with your words in front of your children!

    On Thanksgiving day, a little boy overhears his mom and dad fighting. He hears his mom call his dad a bastard and hears his dad call his mom a bitch.  He asks, “Mommy, what does bastard mean?” She answers, “Um, it means boy.”  Then he asks, “Daddy, what does bitch mean?” He says, “Uh, it means girl.”  Later that day, the boy sees his father in the bathroom shaving; the dad accidentally cuts himself and says, “Sh*t.”  The son asks, “What does that mean?” The dad says, “It means shaving cream.”  Then he sees his mom in the kitchen carving […] More

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    Blonde will be blonde

    There was this blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes.  So one evening she went home and memorized all the state capitals.  Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke.  She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes! I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do… I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said “I don’t believe you.  What is the […] More

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